gmonkey42

There was a troll post on ontd_science and it's already baleeted. It's good that the mods are on top of things. But the last time I saw it, there were only 9 comments and three of those were mine; I'm sure it got a lot worse and now I've missed it!

The OP asked us to comment with common misconceptions about science. The first comment was a link to the relevant Wikipedia page (which I didn't know existed until that xkcd strip!). The second comment was mine with a few of my favorites and a humorous quip about each one.

The OP replied that they weren't really looking for common misconceptions held by the general public, but by scientists. And that comment included the word "experts" in scare quotes. This was the first sign that the thread was headed for deletion. Another commenter and I replied briefly to explain that it doesn't really work like that - if experts (or, indeed "experts") disagree over the interpretation of data then yeah, one will turn out to be more right than the other but that doesn't mean the other one has a misconception. That's not what that word means.

Also we both used the phrase "by definition" and my final comment was to give the other explainer an internet high-five for that.

Then the OP replied that in fact there could be experts who cling to misconceptions but true experts will evaluate new information and be willing to change their minds. Yeahhhh, that second one is called "doing science." So the OP is saying there are experts, who actually adhere to the basic principles of science, and then there are "experts" who... don't? but they're still somehow regarded by other scientists, who know them to be wrong, as experts? Whut? The OP was obviously fishing for something but I can't really articulate what it was. Something involving the OP not understanding how science works, I think. Like the goal of science is to assume we know everything about everything and then we write it down in a bunch of big, heavy textbooks and force everyone to believe in it because we think we're smarter than everyone. You're right, OP, scientists should totally stop doing that!

So at that point I left to watch stand-up comedy on YouTube for a while and when I came back, the post was gone.

You know what's cool, though? The way the OP seems to think science works is itself a common misconception!

As seen on Shakesville.

Joe Francis of Girls Gone Wild is declared Douche of the Decade by Gawker and he responds by not only threatening to sue in a poorly-worded e-mail but also by sending the editor this photo:



I admit that is fairly douchey but I think we can do better:



Come on Joe, reach for the stars!

Jack Chick's new tract about evolution

He left out the part where the the fish-frog has butt sex with a squirrel (NSFW!)

On the Comedy Goldmine "Dumb things overheard in class":
"If evolution is the truth, then you would have half dog half cat animals running around because they always live with each other."

I actually haven't seen that one before. It makes me wonder how the hell this person thinks evolution is supposed to work. Humans live with cats and dogs too, therefore wouldn't there also be freakish cat-dog-human hybrids running - or possibly lurching, zombie-like - around?

I want to put up a web site that explains what "evolution" actually means except I don't think it would make any difference. For a lot of people, it's not really about ignorance, it's about actively not wanting to know.

ETA Haha, here's another from the same page: "But how do you know for sure brontosauruses didn't eat people?"
Pff, because they were herbivores, duh!

Someone sent me the following e-mail:
Subject: this test sucks

Me and my flatmate have taken your test about harry potter to find out that the test doesn`t have anything to do with it!!!!!! What`s wrong with you. Please if you can give me back the time i wasted!!!!!!!!

So I replied:
Not sure what you're talking about: it does have to do with Harry Potter in that it tells you which character has the same Myers-Briggs type as you.

Please find enclosed a full time-refund. Be careful you don't spend it all on hitting the ! key.


GMonkey

The Eppendorf customer service rep had to hunt for the plate specs (see previous post) so she e-mailed them to me just now. And spelled my name "Jillion." But, curiously, got my e-mail address right, which is g[my last name]@[company name].com. With a 'g'!

Except I won't bother. But the cashier/manager at Hollywood Video pissed me off:

1. I came to the counter to open an account and pay for the videos I wanted to rent. There were no other customers at the counter and no "form line here" sign so I just came up to the counter in front of one of the registers. There were FOUR employees standing behind the counter, chatting with each other. I waited a moment to catch their eyes; when I finally got one's attention, I said "hi." He gave me a "hello" nod and went back to chatting with his co-workers. I waited a moment more then said "can I pay for these?" The manager guy moseyed over to a register - not the one I was standing near - and said "oh, I thought you were just standing there." He didn't sound like he was joking. It makes me wonder how often customers just stand there for a while before throwing down their videos in disgust and leaving.

2. I said "I need to open an account" so he gave me the form to fill out. After I'd filled it out - in the less-than-a-minute it took me to write my name and address, he'd already gone back to his conversation and I had to call him back - he took the form and said "is this your correct address?" It took me a great deal of willpower not to say "no, just for fun I put the wrong address."

3. Typing my info, he misspelled my name but caught it, which is good because they'd run out of membership cards, therefore I had no proof that I had an account and I wouldn't have been able to use the account next time if it'd had the wrong name. So making a mistake and then catching it is fine but he thought it was SO funny and I ought to be greatful that he'd avoided screwing up my account.

4. Having finished with the account setup, he said there was a special offer that day where you can get one movie for $1 off with a free bucket of popcorn (the kind that's sealed and you cook it at home). I said I didn't want the popcorn. He had the usual problem store clerks seem to have when I want to decline part of a special offer. Look, it's BETTER for the store if I just get the $1 off and don't take the popcorn, right? Eat it yourself, throw it away, shove it up you ass, I don't care, I just don't want it. So I asked him to give the popcorn to the next person. That was OK and he rang up the videos. He asked me what flavor of popcorn I wanted. One point for him: he realized that was stupid before I had a chance to speak and he said "oh, I guess it doesn't matter," and grabbed a random bucket of popcorn from the stack. I paid for the movies and he put them IN THE BUCKET and held it out for me beyond the anti-theft sensors. I walked around and took the movies out of the bucket. He said "Uh-uh!" and shook the bucket at me like I was stupid and had forgotten my popcorn. I said "no, I don't want-" and then he figured it out and took his damn bucket of popcorn back.

In conclusion: I HATE STUPID PEOPLE!

I posted a little thing about my Sims skins over on the BBS on the official site. It was in the "Community Showcase" section, where people are SUPPOSED to post messages about their sites. So look what some chode posted in reply. (Second one down; the first one's cool). I can understand posting "Don't care" if I'd posted the message on a board where you're not supposed to post stuff like that but... well, I don't usually say this but WTF?

... look at some of the other crap he's posted:
Go eat posion. Why are you bugging maxis with your worthless albulms. Leave us all alone !

Poopy. I'm giving my opinion of your bad albulm. And Poopy to all of you that think i'm mean.

Nope i don't want to see ur houses. But i did and i didn't like em.

And they're all like that. Every single one of his posts (you can search by username to see all of someone's recent posts).
What is he, 12?